Quickie

During a discussion about how he is not well understood by his significant other:
-You have to understand that she's not very smart, she's not very quick at getting these things...[awkward silence] but she's quick at other things
-Like what?
-Well she's quick at cleaning the house.
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Walking on Thin Ice

When a colleague was reconfirming his presence to an ice-skating event:
"I said yes the other day, but since then I spoke to my wife and she said I will fall and break my glasses, so I cannot go"
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